Category Archives: Love and Marriage

Really want to have a partner

Posted on April 22, 2021 by hessd

I have taken a fair amount of abuse lately–abuse of the raised eyebrow kind–for a story I tell about the early courtship days with Bette. The story as I tell it, and I tell it as I remember it, has … Continue reading →

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Going uphill requires resources

Posted on February 19, 2020 by hessd

The summary I found for the recent movie, Downhill, starts like this: “Barely escaping an avalanche during a family ski vacation in the Alps, a married couple is thrown into disarray…” I don’t mean to imply that that is inaccurate, … Continue reading →

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First dates and last dates

Posted on August 12, 2019 by hessd

“Your subscription has been successfully adjusted.” That’s the response I got when I “unsubscribed” from a site called Trip Trivia. [1] For some reason, it made me think of my early dating years. [2] There were girls I wanted to … Continue reading →

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The 12 days of Valentine Season

Posted on February 10, 2019 by hessd

It does sound odd, I am sure.  But Lent sounded odd to me at first and so did Passion Week and Advent.  I think “the 12 Days of Christmas” sounded less odd than those.  A gift a day to a … Continue reading →

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What to do while you are dying

Posted on February 18, 2018 by hessd

It’s a little more complicated than that title suggests. Not a great deal, but a little. [1] It will simplify things a great deal to make the distinction between “it,” the body that serves us well or ill by turns, … Continue reading →

Posted in Getting Old, Living My Life, Love and Marriage | Tagged , , , , , | 7 Comments

A Marriage Covenant

Posted on November 1, 2017 by hessd

We call it a “marriage covenant” without thinking much about it. A covenant is a “coming together,” certainly; every way of parsing the word must note com = “together” and venire = “to come.” But we “come together” in so … Continue reading →

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Resilience and its precursors

Posted on March 6, 2017 by hessd

So far as I have heard, everyone likes “resilience.” Especially in March. Only the good basketball teams wind up in their conference finals, and half of those good teams lose that game. And then they go on to play in … Continue reading →

Posted in Communication, Living My Life, Love and Marriage, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

The Season of Valentine’s Day

Posted on February 5, 2017 by hessd

Bette seems never to have cared about Valentine’s Day one way or the other. I always did: I hated it. As an elementary school child, I ran into the “valentines for everyone in the class” rule. Hated it! Why would … Continue reading →

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Consummating the marriage

Posted on April 29, 2016 by hessd

Everybody knows what it means to “consummate” a marriage, right? It means to “complete” it; to bring it to its highest state.[1] That’s what the words mean anyway. That brings us to the question of what a marriage is. Is … Continue reading →

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A Marriage and a Seismic Upgrade

Posted on February 24, 2016 by hessd

Last week, Bette and I went to see a British movie called 45 Years. The critics were nearly giddy about it; the viewers not so much. Great direction; great script; great cast. So I had my doubts. It is, in … Continue reading →

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